8 great coming out moments in TV and Film
Entertainment
Despite the many advancements made for the LGBTQ+ community in recent years, coming out can still be just as difficult now as it was decades ago. There are many ways to progress past the need for coming out and to build a society where people are free to identify how they wish without assumptions or questions, and part of that journey comes in the form of normalizing different queer experiences.
Whether it’s through fiction or more high-profile figures expressing themselves, prominent representation of the coming out process is the next stage of making it easier for other members of the community to do so.
Knowing this, here are 8 scenes from TV and film that have helped to normalize coming out, offering viewers a glimpse into the emotional struggle many LGBTQ+ still face to this day.
Nick Nelson – Heartstopper
2022 has been an excellent year for LGBTQ+ content so far, with perhaps the most popular being Netflix’s Heartstopper. Kit Connor plays closeted bisexual teenager Nick Nelson, who finds himself falling for openly gay classmate Charlie Spring. The series follows Charlie as he tries to suppress his romantic feelings for Nick, who he believes is heterosexual and only sees him as a friend. However, as the series progresses, Nick starts questioning the depth of his relationship with the other boy.
The heart of the series comes in last episode, however, when Nick sits down to confess these feelings to his mother (played by the ever-masterful Olivia Colman). He reveals that he experiences attraction to both boys and girls, and that he is in love with Charlie. His mom’s response is heartfelt and beautiful, having such a strong impact that many viewers took to Twitter to tell Kit Connor how the scene inspired them to come out as bisexual. It remains one of the most poignant and well-made LGBTQ+ scenes this year.
David Rose - Schitt's Creek
This Canadian sitcom focuses on the wealthy Rose family who suddenly lose everything overnight, only retaining the asset of a small, rough town called Schitt's Creek. They have no choice but to move to the unfamiliar environment and integrate with its inhabitants. Among the family is the spectacularly camp David Rose, expertly played by Dan Levy, who is especially suffering from the sudden lack of luxury. He reluctantly makes friends with the unexpressive receptionist Stevie Budd (Emily Hampshire) who helps him navigate the town.
After sleeping together, Stevie approaches David to clarify how he identifies after initially believing him to be gay. Dan Levy’s writing provides a beautiful subtle analogy for sexuality and identity, without explicitly using LGBTQ+ terms. They substitute them for wine labels instead, where David confirms his pansexuality to Stevie:
“I do drink red wine. But I also drink white wine. And I’ve been known to sample the occasional rosé. And a couple summers back, I tried a Merlot that used to be a Chardonnay, which got a bit complicated… I like the wine and not the label.”
Blanca Evangalista – Pose
Pose has a strong claim to be the best LGBTQ+ show of the 2010s. With rare, authentic trans representation at the heart of it, and several other identities and experiences within the LGBTQ+ community, it raises the bar for the quality of representation our community should expect. Michaela Jaé Rodriguez plays Blanca Evangalista, a confident trans woman who sets up a house share with other LGBTQ+ people who have been rejected by friends and family.
The story delicately tackles the queer experience of living through the 1980s AIDS epidemic, offering different points of view and a realistic, if heartbreaking depiction of that time. After taking young gay man Damon under her wing, Blanca tells him of how she came out to her mother. Though the response she received was unsupportive, the story provides proof of her strength, courage and confidence, a staple aspect of her character’s journey throughout the show.
Adam Groff - Sex Education
Netflix’s Sex Education offers a wide range of identities, all at different stages of acceptance. Eric Effiong (played by the electrifying Ncuti Gatwa) is already out and proud about his sexuality when we first meet him, with much of the story focusing on his failed attempts to pursue romantic interests. Initially, Adam Groff (Connor Swindells) is Eric’s daily nightmare, targeting him and bullying him due to his extravagant and carefree nature. However, as the show progresses, we soon learn that Adam’s behavior is a consequence of the damaging insecurities that come with being closeted.
The progression and development of Eric and Adam’s relationship is one of the most well-written aspects of the show, as Adam faces an internal struggle and turns to Eric for help. Eric does not let him forget the years of torment Adam put him through, until Adam eventually comes out as bisexual. In a testament to his forgiving nature, Eric helps Adam through these feelings, eventually even sparking romantic feelings for each other.
Simon Spier - Love, Simon
This is THE coming out movie. Love, Simon was groundbreaking in many ways – the most prominent being that it was the first major Hollywood studio film to focus on a gay teenage romance. Based on the award-winning novel by Becky Albertalli, the movie follows closeted teen Simon Spier (Nick Robinson) and the story of how he gains the courage to come out to his friends and family. Simon slowly falls in love with an anonymous pen pal from his school known as ‘Blue’ who also identifies as gay, and the movie follows their virtual relationship as they share their anxieties and similar worries of being closeted.
The movie contains multiple coming out scenes, from warmly received, touching moments between friends, to the harsh depiction of an LGBTQ+ person being outed against their will. Perhaps the most impactful performance of the film is when Simon comes out to his parents (Jennifer Garner and Josh Duhamel), and they both tearfully accept him and express their love and relief on his behalf.
A warm love letter to both closeted and out LGBTQ+ viewers, this charming romantic comedy is deserving of all the praise it continues to receive.
Isaiah Stannard - Good Girls
Popular American comedy series Good Girls surprised many in 2019 with a delightfully wholesome coming out scene between a mother and her son. The series primarily focuses on three struggling suburban mothers who attempt a supermarket heist and deal with the chaos that ensues. Beyond the comedic plot lies a subtle character drama, especially between Annie Marks (Mae Whitman) and her child.
In a quiet scene between them, Annie makes a joke about the birth of her ex-husband's new baby, exclaiming “It’s a boy!”, to which her son softly replies “So am I.” It’s a touching moment between the two characters, offering a rare glimpse into a fictional trans coming out scene with a positive outcome. Beautifully performed and written, this scene is exactly how coming out scenes should be done, and indeed how coming out should ideally go for every trans person.
Rosa Diaz - Brooklyn 99
American police-based comedy Brooklyn 99 features a wonderful range of characters, from the eager-to-please Amy Santiago to the endearingly strange Gina Linetti. There’s already fantastic gay representation with Captain Raymond Holt, whose intense stare could make lions back down, but the show’s best coming out moment is all about the ferociously menacing Detective Rosa Diaz.
In a scene from the fifth season, Rosa announced mid-meeting that she is bisexual, allowing her colleagues exactly one minute to ask questions pertaining to this. In the joyously light-hearted scene, everyone is respectful, and humor is used to divert any awkward tension the scene could have had. The show continues this storyline with scenes between Rosa and her parents and friends, offering more fantastic character-focused moments hidden behind the comedy.
Jack - Big Boys
This semi-autobiographical comedy drama by comedian Jack Rooke follows a closeted university student who forms an unlikely friendship with his macho roommate. Dylan Llewellyn plays this young version of Jack with superb awkwardness (not to mention a staggering perm) as we’re guided through the grief of losing his dad, the maverick friendship group he makes, and the many first-time experiences of gay life as an adolescent in 00’s England.
His mom (Camille Coduri) is unaware of her son’s internal struggle, until he eventually sits her down and tells her the truth. What follows is easily the most heartwarming moment of the show, as she reveals his late father always had a feeling his son was gay and left him a letter wishing him happiness. What starts off as a light-hearted comedy, poking fun at early 21st century British culture, gradually turns into a beautiful tale of self-acceptance and finding happiness.
Read related myGwork articles here:
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