9 ways to maintain a healthy life, to empower you to empower those around you

About the author - Omer Nakar, MA, is a qualified music therapist at Child and Adolescent Mental Health Services, NHS, London.

How are you, really? Coping with life under lockdown? Managing with working from home?

Balancing between work and private life wasn’t easy before lockdown, it surely doesn’t make things easier now. Suddenly our private space has turned into an office, a gym, an arts & crafts workshop or a greenhouse. You might be feeling you are flourishing, living healthier and finding more time for yourself (bye-bye commuting)? Maybe you lost a job or a long-awaited project, and you’re asking yourself what’s the point? Wherever you’re at, know that the reaction you are experiencing is completely natural and there is no right or wrong here. We all respond to traumatic events differently, with our own strengths and limitations.

On a community level, it’s not a secret that the LGBTQ+ community experiences major inequalities in all aspects of life, and if this statement was true before Miss Ronna made an entrance, it’s even more evident now, as the community faces extreme cases of loneliness, loss of jobs which might have been difficult to secure in the first place, difficulties with accessing medical treatment or medication and even of individuals spending lockdown in a hostile environment. However, just as the demand for support is increasing, charities are simultaneously losing many of their sources of income.

But it’s not all over yet. As painful as these situations are, our community has endless resources to help the people who construct it, and it all starts with you! Here are some ways to support you with maintaining a healthy life, to empower you to empower those around you (so please put that drink down).

1. Stay informed - knowing the facts is very important, not only so we can join the conversation during the virtual team coffee break, but it gives us a sense of control and diminishes uncertainty (goodbye anxiety!). However, it’s important to make sure the information we take in is reliable and not (I’m not going to say it…I’m not going to say it…) fake news (I said it). So, choose your sources wisely. Limit your news intake to once a day to allow yourself enough time to process the information afterwards and avoid the news close to bedtime.

2. A word on music - be mindful of the music you bring into your life. Music can be destructive to your wellbeing if consumed without care and awareness. To keep it simple, think of the music you listen to and of the physical and mental reactions you experience in response. If a specific artist brings you down because of a recent breakup, or that DJ makes you crave for a drug-fueled rave, you might want to have an honest conversation with yourself and change to something more positive, empowering and healthy. And remember, listening to music releases dopamine in the brain, so is just as important as food and sex!

3. Stick to a routine - COVID-19 caused a major disruption to our previous routine. Creating a new one and sticking to it will add a sense of regaining control. This includes having a work schedule, breaks and even with food (The digestive system loves a schedule, so eat at regular times and avoid eating just before sleeping). Think of routine as the rhythm of your day (and night).

4. Screen time - It's always there, in every conversation, every meeting, every session. And even when it’s time to relax, you probably turn one screen off just to turn another on. Start your day phone-free and allow yourself at least 30 minutes before going to sleep without staring at any screen. Give your eyes frequent breaks. Like in every relationship, some time off is fundamental.

5. Keep it exciting - We talked about routines. So now let’s talk about spicing up your world a little. Picking up a new hobby, trying a new move, starting a dream journal, reading an article on a subject that is ‘not you’, or listening to an album of an artist you never heard of. Try it, you will discover a new you. Make sure to treat yourself, have something to look forward to, even if it’s only a ridiculous takeaway at the end of the week.

6. Stay active - You probably have Madonna’s “I’ve heard it all before” playing in your head right now, so just remember that staying active could help your brain function throughout the day and night. It also creates a sense of accomplishment which can build your confidence, as well as your muscles.

7. Set goals and work towards achieving them, but don’t beat yourself up if you haven’t. It’s important to be kind to yourself. The trick is to act on the micro and visualise the macro.

8. Talk about it! We are social beings. A sense of community is very important for our own well-being, so stay connected and talk to people you feel close to. If you feel no one around you understands, talk to your GP or find a therapist (it is still possible to have virtual sessions! Don’t wait until the lockdown is lifted).

9. And give back. Look for ways to support and help others. Your ear is sometimes more valuable than your wallet. Organisations are thirsty for volunteers to call an elderly who is alone at home under lockdown, a mentor or someone who could use their biceps to carry food delivery for vulnerable individuals. Helping others is helping yourself.