Big Mouth actor shares nonbinary identity: “Allow me to reintroduce myself”

Actor, writer, and activist Brandon Kyle Goodman has announced their nonbinary identity and their use of they/them pronouns through social media and Substack.

Goodman, 37, is renowned for their performances on Netflix’s animated series ‘Big Mouth and Human Resources’, Amazon’s ‘Modern Love’, and Hulu’s ‘Plus One’. They also recently debuted a podcast titled ‘Tell Me Something Messy.’ In 2022, Goodman released the book, ‘You Gotta Be You: How to Embrace This Messy Life and Step into Who You Really Are’.

In an Instagram post, Goodman shared, “Allow me to reintroduce myself. my name is brandon kyle goodman. my pronouns are they/them/theirs. i’ll give you all the grace when you slip up. it’ll be a gentle transition for both of us. when in doubt you can always use Brandon, B, BKG, or (messy) mom! it is my great honor to be on this journey back to myself. i’m grateful to share it with you. to love you and be loved by you.”

Previously, Goodman had spoken about being nonbinary and used he/they pronouns, stating that retaining “he” was mainly for the comfort of others. According ti ‘Queerty’, they express that they/them pronouns suit them better, regardless of masculine or feminine presentation.

“I’m free.” On Substack, Goodman expanded on this sentiment.

“I’m free. Finally. It took all 37 years to come home to myself, but I am back in my body. In my mind. In my heart. In my soul. breathe I’m free. I don’t have to be what anyone said I should be. I don’t have to be my mother’s dream. My father’s secret. My family’s shame. I can be me. Independently. Unapologetically. Magically. Me.”

They continued, stating, “As far back as my bones can hold feeling, I have been chasing the approval of others,” emphasising their lifelong desire for acceptance and celebration, and how it led to adopting different versions of themselves.

Goodman recounted their journey to fully embrace their identity since becoming estranged from their born-again Christian mother 13 years ago. After the passing of their grandmother, who raised them, Goodman’s mother visited with Bible verses deeming their lifestyle sinful, then left, cutting off contact.

“After the initial grief, I had two options–go f*ck myself or go find myself,” Goodman said, adding that this rejection has motivated them to fully embrace who they are, rather than seeking others' approval.

“Four years ago, I realized I was non-binary. I kept it to myself for a few months, and then shared publicly with my new he/they pronouns. I’ve said, and even wrote in my book, that my he pronouns were for the world, and they pronouns were for me. I always felt like I had a lot more barriers of oppression to navigate that were more pressing than which pronouns to use. I didn’t have the capacity to correct people or engage in gender studies discussion.”

Goodman described being greatly moved while watching the Macy’s parade last Thursday for the first time in years.

“Actor/writer and star of the hit Broadway show ‘Oh, Mary,’ Cole Escola was on one of the floats. As the camera was capturing them atop a colorful Flamingo, the NBC anchors spoke about Cole using They/Them pronouns.”

“I stood in front of my television gooped. Shook. Emotional. The seven year old in me perked up. A signal that it’s okay to be different. It’s okay to not feel like the boys and girls. An affirmation of the gut feeling that there’s more to life than these boxes everyone is trying to put everybody else in.”

“Hearing ‘they/them’ on my television on Thanksgiving morning cracked me open. I felt suddenly, I don’t need to take care of ‘the world’ anymore. I don’t need to fit in. I don’t need to be seen as a ‘he.’ I just need to be me. Brandon.”