Coming Out on Zoom

Ahead of Lesbian Visibility Week 20-26 April Laila El-Metoui is revisiting aspects of the coming out process in the light of the increased virtual communication and greater frequency of video conferencing. Here’s what she says:

Before the lock down I could just go to work, be my professional self and go home to my sanctuary. I could choose to be or not to be my authentic self. I could choose to come out or not. With the increase of video conferencing, I feel that I’ve had an mini invasion of my privacy and that I’m intruding on other people’s home too.

In a recent zoom meeting, one of the female participants was wearing a vest top, sitting on her bed with various things hanging out of the metal frame headboard, while her female partner was coming in and out of the room in the background.

All LGBT+ people know that coming out is a constant and ongoing process. Every time we meet new people, we choose to come out or not.

Someone recently asked on an online forum whether they should come out. They were questioning themselves as they were about to attend a virtual reunion, so I thought I’d share some of own truth and experience with you.

1. The coming out process and expected reaction is often bigger in my head than what happens in reality

2. Coming out and being my true self is freeing / liberating. The more I do it the stronger I become

3. Being prepared for homophobic remarks and having some ready made responses to potential bigotry helps

4. There is a distinct difference between accept and agree, between an insult and an opinion

7. Bigotry based on religious beliefs is not a universal truth. The guilt based on their opinion is not mine

5. Having someone, on speed dial, to speak to for emotional support or celebration is helpful.

6. Zoom has a hide video / camera feature, I can choose not to be seen and be on audio.

7. I can easily come out of an uncomfortable situation and blame my internet connection, saying that’s to become instable and leave the meeting

8. I don’t have to come out if I don’t want to.

Whatever one decides is the right decision for them at that time.

Before having a video conference / meeting.

Next week is lesbian visibility week, here are some events you may want to attend

https://www.eventbrite.co.uk/e/102557915486

https://www.eventbrite.co.uk/e/102627202726

More about Lesbian Visibility week on this link

https://www.lesbianvisibilityweek.com