myGwork stories #2 Mexico - 'Being gay in two different cities: London and Mexico City'

The memory is still fresh of the first time I set foot in London, September of 2009, a city full of energy and cosmopolitan faces on the streets, I also remember my first time in what I believed to be the heart of gay London: Soho. Never had I seen so many gay people in one place. Never had I seen so many rainbow flags and same sex public displays of affection without raising anybody’s eyebrows. A breeze of freedom was floating in the air, and I intended on enjoying it as much as I could. Unfortunately, I was there just for a few days on holidays, bound to be back eventually to my neck of the woods, Mexico City.

The excitement of that holiday in London and seeing that there was a place where being gay was so easy, made me promise myself that one day I would come back more permanently to London to enjoy it to the fullest.

I always knew I was gay; it never really was a question for me. The question was how to be gay in place like Mexico City, where being stigmatised as a “fag”, was one of the worst and yet most common insults that existed in a repertoire that was already vast.

An unequally open Mexican society
I made it through my studies in the closet, only came out to a few friends in my last years of University. Then I joined the graduate programme of one of the leading FMCG companies, Things were working well for me, I started professionally growing at a fast pace, I actually had my first serious gay relationship there, but it was a secret one as I only came out to the colleagues that were really close to me after a few years. The company was from the U.S.A. and had a non-discrimination policy, but the mindset of the majority of the people was a different story, Organizational culture can hardly ever override the national one. I never heard anybody openly expressing they were gay, even though there quite a few gay people.

At first glance from a legal perspective, it might seem that London and Mexico city are not that far apart in terms of LGBT tolerance, after all, same sex civil unions were legalise in Mexico city in 2006 and in London in 2004, and gay marriage became a reality for Mexico city in 2010, that’s 4 years before than London, so they don’t seem to be that different, right?

Freedom to be yourself
The difference became more obvious when on February of 2011 the promise I had made to myself of coming back to London on a more permanent bases, turned into a reality. Ever since then I have experienced the freedom of being able to be openly gay without the fear of jeopardising my professional development, the freedom of holding hands on the street with my significant other without being condemned by the majority around, the freedom of being able to share with my colleagues the joy of getting into a civil partnership just as any straight person would do. I finally had what the French called the right to indifference.

I don’t want to be misunderstood and give the impression that Mexico City is one of the worst places on earth to be gay, it’s not at all! I have full support from my friends and family, there is a decent amount of gay bars and clubs to socialise, several companies have policies that protect against discrimination. However you must still be careful when showing any displays of affection in public areas that are not specifically known to be gay friendly. Chances of getting any help from the police in case of discrimination or harassment are very low and there are still many companies that will penalize the development of employees that are openly gay. Signing a same sex civil union or marriage is only possible in 6 out of the 32 federal entities in the country.

There is still a long way to go to reach a similar level of tolerance and equality than the one in London, but I’m confident that Mexico is walking in the right direction. Support for LGBT people continues to rise as more voices speaking out loud the immutable truth that all people are created free and equal in dignity and rights.