The Coming Out Chronicles from Omnicom Media Group UK

To mark International Coming Out Day on 11 October, OMG UK asked colleagues from the LGBTQ+ communities if they would like to share their own inspiring coming out stories. Here are just three of those stories:

KUSHAL’S STORY

I grew up in a small town in India. The first time I came across the word “homosexuality” was in 8th grade, when the High Court decriminalized gay sex. Until then, I hadn’t known another gay person, nor had I ever seen anyone like me represented in Indian entertainment—except as a comic effect in movies. My denial phase, fortunately, only lasted about two weeks, right after my biology teacher told us homosexuality was a mental disorder. Around the same time, I came across a popular yoga guru claiming that his brand of apple juice could cure it.

When two weeks of chugging apple juice didn’t work, I realised I had to live with it. While I had never quite felt like “one of the boys,” at least I finally knew why, and that brought me relief. I was popular at school and my parents’ pride and joy, but I knew if I wanted to stay that way, my secret would have to remain just that—a secret.

In 2013, the freedom I had begun to take for granted was ripped away when the Supreme Court reinstated the law, once again declaring gay sex “unnatural.” This marked one of the darkest periods for me. I was old enough to feel shame but too young to rationalise it. I felt alienated in my own country, and I distanced myself from my family, fearing they would never accept me.

When I moved to Mumbai for college, my world began to expand. Two years in, I met the first openly gay person I knew, through an online app. We became friends, and for the first time, I didn’t have to hide a part of myself. I could talk openly about love interests without switching pronouns. To my surprise, one of my best friends turned out to be gay as well.

In 2018, when the Supreme Court finally legalised homosexuality for good, I gained enough confidence to sit my parents down for dinner and, during a rare quiet moment, share my secret. My father was shocked and barely spoke to me for a few days. Then, they decided to take me to a “psychologist”—who turned out to be a quack. He claimed he could help me explore my “bisexual potential” but refused to provide a “cure” when I joked about some straight boys, I’d like to help explore theirs.

Thankfully, that was the extent of their rebellion against my truth. I have to give my family credit—they never stopped loving me, even though they still urge me not to tell “society” back home that I’m gay. Ironically, I think they’d be surprised to learn how much more open-minded and liberal India has become. After all, you can no longer find apple juice that claims to cure homosexuality on the market.

KUSHAL BAJPAI is a Senior Analyst for Annalect EMEA (part of Omnicom Media Group UK)

ALI’S STORY

I’d always fancied boys and girls as a teenager in the 90s and had the odd girlfriend when I was at university – so my friends and family always knew I was attracted to both genders and never made anything of it. So, I didn’t really have an official coming out moment saying I was bisexual at that stage of my life. I got married (to a man) relatively young as I started my media career – and so I always passed as straight, and I didn’t correct anyone at work. I think, subconsciously, I didn’t want to label myself in case there were negative judgements which could hold back my career.

Fast forward 20 years, and it was during lockdown that my Head of Culture at a previous agency where I was the MD asked me to join a ‘Courageous Conversation’ webinar to talk about covering in the workplace. He had asked me to come at it from the angle of being a mother, and what aspects of parenting I had covered in a bid to avoid the motherhood penalty in advertising and media. In the end however, I knew I had something else which I had been covering for a long time and came out to him during our prep call. He said it would be hugely inspiring to see a bi woman in leadership opening up to the agency from a representational point of view – and would I mind talking about that aspect of covering my identity instead?

When the webinar went live, my heart was racing: will everyone think I am attention-seeking? Will they think I’m not really bi because I’m married to a man? Will the queer community accept me as a bi woman leading from the front instead of an ally from the sidelines? Will I be sexualised? Lots of these themes happen (relating to biphobia/ bi-erasure) when someone who is bi comes out – am I doing the right thing?

As it got to my turn on the panel, and I opened up and came out, my WhatsApp and Teams channel lit up with dozens of messages of support (and a fair bit of positive surprise!) making me feel so supported and loved – and that I had done the right thing. It made me realise how empowering it can be for more junior people in the LGBTQ+ community working in our agencies to see themselves as a potential future leader whilst out and proud – something which has spurred me on in my work in this space, as a voice of bi women in our industry.

ALI REED is CEO of PHD UK and Board Sponsor of OMG UK’s LGBTQ+ advisory group

DANIEL’S STORY

Like many young gay people in the early 2000s, I had a terrible fear of coming out. I feared I would be judged. That I wouldn’t be accepted. That my career would suffer. As a result, I did not share details of my life with most coworkers for my first half decade in the media industry.

Then one day, after a tough day personally, a colleague asked what was wrong. I opened up to her, and she was the first person on my account to know I was gay. Nothing changed about my relationship with her. In fact, I suddenly felt more interesting. I had something more to offer others. Slowly, I came out to everyone at work. I quickly realised there doesn’t even need to be a big reveal. I can just be myself.

Luckily, we work in an industry where being gay is common. As I get older, I understand how our differences can and should be celebrated. And perhaps we can do more to support others, from the LGBTQ+ community but importantly other minorities who don’t have the same level of support and understanding

DANIEL BLOCK is an Agency Partner for OMD EMEA